we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
