smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize