every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
