im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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