I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize