Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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