You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
All I want is dick and wine.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize