Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
