I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize