I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
My breasts were aching with rage.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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