Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
You are the jesus of drinking
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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