barbara walters just said penis...
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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