Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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