it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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