She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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