you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
