I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
