He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I fill condoms, not promises.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
