Jerry, you need to find god
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
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I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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