i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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