I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize