when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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