you told grandpa to call you daddy
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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