Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
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