I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
