And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
no you cant smoke seaweed
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
