Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
