so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize