I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
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