the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
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