from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
