Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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