I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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