Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize