people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
