ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
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we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
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I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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