i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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