But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
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