Im at strip club and am horny
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I party with great urgency now.
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