I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
