i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
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