I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
