we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
