Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Randomize
