He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
what day is it and did you see me today?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize