were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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