it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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