For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize