The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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