i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
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My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
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She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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