R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
